Tales from the Frontlines: ‘You’ll Make an Excellent Wife!’
Today, a 25-year-old Oakland woman writes:
I worked in a cafe, in a bookstore. One night I worked late with the manager, because that week some regional manager was visiting for an inspection. We had to scrub down every surface and make everything as organized as possible. I spent my time on my hands and knees, scrubbing and scrubbing and scrubbing. The manager dawdled, threw out some trash, and basically accomplished nothing. After an hour of this, I stand up, sweaty and tired, and he says to me, “Wow! Great Job! Some day, you will make an excellent wife!”
As if that was my aspiration in life.
I complained to someone higher up. He came to me and apologized and explained it was meant as a compliment, as if that would make it okay.
Not two weeks later, a coworker and I are working. Helping customers, cleaning, doing whatever needs doing, but we hadn’t done the dishes yet. This same manager says to my coworker, “There are two women here! Why aren’t the dishes done?!” We both refused to wash the dishes that night. The manager never got in any kind of trouble for any of this.
It’s three years later and it still makes my blood boil when I think about this.
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